Still Working on that Solo...

It's been a rough couple weeks since I last updated this. I really haven't had much time to do anything except hang on and weather the storm, so I apologize for not having any new pictures or anything like that.

To put it simply, I've had the worst two weeks in flight school. I received a "Ready-Room Down" (a failure/unsate/pink sheet/very bad thing) for not being well enough prepared for my OCF brief. I knew an Emergency Procedure, but not well enough as I should have... it was my fault and it won't happen again.

However, since it was my first failure in my year and a half of flight school, I took it pretty hard. I got my $%&# together and finally flew my OCF flight, it went very well. The problem was that I had been working 12-hour days since my Down, but was so crazed about pressing ahead and redeeming myself I really didn't pay attention to how exhausted I was making myself. The day after my OCF flight, after almost a week of operating on less than optimal sleep, I flew a morning flight and did decently well. I thought I could just have a good lunch and press through my FAM check ride (like a driver's test... the last hurdle before my solo).

Armed with a ton of adrenaline and nervous energy I made the call to press and do my flight. That was a bad idea. Seconds after takeoff I realized how "out of it" I was (we call that "a loss of Situational Awareness" or "SA"). So my SA sucked and I started making mistakes, busting through altitudes, forgeting landing checklists, poor execution of maneuvers and I came very close to "over-speeding" the landing gear. The landing gear can only stay down below certain airspeeds (200kts) to keep it from becoming damaged by the airstream.

In the de-brief I was told that each one of my mistakes by itself would not have gotten me my second down that week, but all of them demonstrated that I was not safe to solo.

The consequences to this were that I had to get back into my khaki uniform (worn only on the first day check-in and in case of a failure, we call them the "robes of shame" because if you're wearing them, everyone knows that you screwed up). I had to explain to quite a few superiors why I was deficient... twice... and in one week. Finally I had to go through a "Performance Review Board." A PRB is Navy code for a meeting where 3 instructors and a flight doctor determine if you get to stay in flight school. Yes, my $%^&# were that close to the bandsaw and again, all in the space of a week... yikes.

Of course they kept me, but it was definitely a painful experience. However, I learned a ton, not just about flight school but about myself. I learned that I definitely stress out wayyy too much, that I care about grades wayyy too much (by the way, they aren't that great... anymore) and that I need to stop worrying about what platform I'll eventually fly; we're all lucky just to be here. Additionally, it was cool to know that despite how much the process sucked, everyone here wants me to succeed, it's not like Primary where there's a lot less invested in you. It's very humbling, but still scary to be struggling (even if it was only just a bad week). I also found out that I'm definitely not alone, just as there are guys who breeze through the program here there are just as many who are struggling more than I am.

I also bought a car, an 07 Subaru Forrester, to keep the pressure off the MG (yes, everyone, you were right, it's no longer viable as my only car). I've been given 2 extra flights and then I'll re-do the check-ride. I've had one already and it's gone well. I'll do the second one this afternoon if the clouds don't get in the way. That means that hopefully I'll check and solo tomorrow... finally.

In the end, I'm hanging in there, I had a great flight yesterday, I still like my job and flying is still fun.

In other news, I *might* fly to Stewart Int'l (right outside NYC... y'know near the home-country) in a couple weeks... so stay tuned.